The Best Game You Can Name, by Dave Bidini

I've been reading this absolute playground of a hockey novel for work...this is spot on:

"Those who've never been part of a dressing room's klatch might suspect that, other than arguing over the respective merits of film and literature, players might use their time to probe philosophical concepts, take the temperature of the world's political climate, or muse on the general health of the planet. But instead, male athletes talk about their penises. Sometimes, we dwell on other matters too - like who is or isn't a big homo - but mostly, it's about my penis, your penis, the president of Swaziland's penis, and why the dirtiest player on the opposing team - who may or may not be a big homo - can't stop touching his penis or really wants to touch yours."

"Brad holds the team record for using words like 'booty' and 'stoked' and, occasionally, 'pimpin'. Still there was something rather disturbing about standing in the dressing room with our yarballs hanging out, listening to Brad describe the pleasuring effect of the speedbag on women not moments before calling whomever we were playing 'friggin' homo gaylords,' that is when we weren't hugging or spanking each other after goals as if in the grip of romantic love."